Why I Won’t Wear a Bikini

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Have you seen this video?  The Evolution of the Swimsuit by Jessica Rey has had me thinking for a few weeks now since I first saw it.  Take a moment to view it if you haven’t yet, and then let’s discuss below.

If you’ve been around Home Maid Simple for awhile, you may recall my post Why I Wear a Dress to Church, and be thinking this is a similar post. Well, you’d be right. It’s very similar because I am going to discuss my clothing choices that tend to be unpopular and old fashioned in the worlds view.
But, I want to hear your opinions, and why you choose to wear what you do. So read through, then leave me a comment. All I ask is you be nice.

Let’s get started here. I’m going to quote Ms Rey here, and delve further into a few key points I felt she made.

“We have certainly come a long way since then. From practically wearing a house 36 square feet to wearing about 36 square inches of fabric”

Indeed we have come a long way. I really don’t know how swimming could have been an enjoyable event when you’re being deposited right into the water, but that’s how the world was then. However, if I had to choose to go swimming wearing a house or a bikini – I would choose a house. 
For me personally, I would never be comfortable in a bikini. Is it because I’m self conscious of my body? yes. But it’s also because I know in today’s society, everyone is looking at your body – trying to improve you, tell you where you need some work, and make sure you feel sufficiently horrible about yourself so you’ll buy their products to look beautiful forever. 
I don’t need that in my life, so I don’t need to wear something that would attract that exact kind of reaction. Give me the house!  Thankfully we have moved past the house swimming, and have more modest options now, so I can go enjoy swimming in comfort. 
Jessica quotes Modern Girl Magazine as saying “no girl with tact or decency would ever wear such a thing” in regards to the bikini

What happened? Where did all our tact and decency go?  Out the window apparently, because as Ms Rey later says, parents are buying these skimpy clothes for their girls. Little girls would still be dressing modestly if their parents would buy them modest clothing. As parents are we conditioning our children from a young age that they must be beautiful to succeed? 
As the mother of 3 little girls I feel it is my responsibility to cultivate self worth in my children. I want them to understand that they can make an impression on people with their confidence and attitude, without having to show some skin. I actually really like how Jenny over at Mommin’ It Up put it in her How Not To Dress Your Daughter post.
You can dress modestly without sacrificing Fashion

You disagree with me?  I admit, I am not the most fashionable person on this planet (I’d be rich if I were), but I do have a sense of fashion. I don’t have to be “frumpy” to dress modestly. For example, let’s talk about my wedding, and look at my brides maids dresses. I think you will agree that the alterations we did, in no way took away from the fashion of these dresses, and made them “frumpy”. I had sent my 2 best friends and bridesmaids on a hunt for their dresses with only a color choice in mind. They called me up to tell me they found the perfect dresses, but they were sleeveless. GASP! I know you all did that, sleeveless, really Adelina? But yes, to me and my friends sleeveless dresses were immodest. I made a quick run to the store to check them out, and we found 3 of the dresses. It was perfect. We bought all 3 dresses, and then sent them to my neighbor who was also doing the alterations on my own wedding gown. Tell me now, would you ever have guessed these dresses had been sleeveless?
With a simple alterations, my friends felt beautiful, and modest – I felt comfortable with what they were wearing (and may still be slightly jealous that we didn’t find a fourth for me to keep) – and the guests at my wedding could be comfortable as they were welcomed to our reception by my beautiful and modest friends. 
Natural sense of modesty…has been stripped away by today’s culture. We need to bring it back.
I truly feel as women we have been stripped of our natural sense of modesty. As Hollywood, models, actresses, and companies selling beauty products tell us as women to be powerful we must show some skin without turning the eyes of men.  I’m really not sure that’s even possible actually. We may be able to pretend that the way we dress doesn’t effect those around us, but it does. I really liked this post Free Advertising for Satan, where the author said, and I quote 

“Maybe it’s not entirely the women’s responsibility to keep a man’s mind clean and pure, but if the man is doing everything in his power to do what he can, why can’t we as women help him out, make it a bit easier for him. It’s not wrong for a man to need a little bit of extra help.”

Will you help bring back our natural sense of modesty? Think About It!

Modesty is…about revealing our Dignity 

Lets start by defining dignity. According to Wikipedia Dignity has descriptive meaning for one’s human worth. The word derives from Latin via French origins that denote respect.
Are we showing ourselves respect by wearing a bikini? Are we showing respect to our fellow swimmers (be they men or women) by wearing a bikini?  Personally I don’t feel we are. If I decided to bare my stomach, and allow my breasts to barely be covered (and in some bikinis that’s stretching it), I would feel I sunk my dignity to have the appraisal of my fellow humans. By covering up my whole torso when I swim, I feel I have given my body the respect it deserves. Not only that, I have given my husband the respect he deserves – because no man needs to see my body the way my husband does. I can not control men’s thoughts, but I can enable them by what I am wearing. 
And that my dear readers is why I will continue to pass by the bikinis, and opt for something modest in my swim attire. 

How Will You Use Your Beauty
-Jessica Rey

10 thoughts on “Why I Won’t Wear a Bikini

  1. I did wear bikinis when I was a teenager mostly because you could get a better tan and it was cooler. Now we know that tanning isn't a good thing to do.
    What really bothers me is padded bikinis for preadolescent girls. I think the message is very wrong to this age. My daughter is 11 and sees bikinis as impractical because they aren't good for swimming. I don't think they are appropriate for her age group because it sexualizes these girls who don't need to grow up any faster than they all ready are.

    1. Thanks for your thoughts Diane! I agree the pads are really pushing it.

      My question is, when is it ever ok to sexualize women? Is there an appropriate age that that becomes ok? I'm sure for some that seems like a prudish question, but I'm serious.

  2. I honestly feel that whatever a woman feels most comfortable in should be her choice. I would never judge someone else by the bathing suit they choose. And if I get to my goal weight you'd better bet I'm going to be sporting a bikini 🙂 I'll be proud of the work I've done (working out, eating healthy, etc) to get down to a weight I'm happy with.

    However I'm a grown woman. As a teenager I chose tankinis instead of bikinis because I didn't want to show off my body. I also have chosen one pieces for my daughter if not tankinis (that completely cover the belly) only for the convenience of going to the potty.

    The biggest thing I worry about is not necessarily beach wear, it's everyday wear (which you've touched on). Women need to realize that the way you dress is the way you are perceived by society. There's no way around that. By presenting yourself in modest wear most others will respect you more. But I still love a tank top in the summer.

    1. Thank you for stopping by Danielle! I truly appreciate your last comments about everyday wear, because I really think that's what it boils down to. I think the bikini was a stepping stone into so many other very immodest choices in clothing.
      I try very hard not to judge anyone, which is why this was just an explanation on why I personally will not wear a bikini, or other immodest clothing. To each their own, and whatever they feel comfortable in.

  3. I just don't think bikinis look very good. It looks like people are parading around in their underwear. It reminds me of The Emperor's New Clothes. Last year I was able to find a high-necked one-piece, and I bought a separate skirt for the bottom. I would prefer to leave at least something to the imagination.

  4. Dianna, I loved your last comment. Adelina, I love this whole post. As a mother who raised 4 sons to adulthood I suffered greatly through their maturing years with the possibility they might be lead astray by the world. My father took me aside and told me to be patient and trust my sons to make good decisions and try to understand that "It is hard to go through puberty wanting to impregnate every girl you see." I was lucky to have pretty good boys (at least, if they were truly "led astray" I never found out.):) So when Dalin Oaks said, "Some girls, by the way they dress, become pornography for some men." It hit me hard. I agree that we should not judge others, but often the choices of others just make life more difficult for those around them.

  5. I think that a woman should wear something that makes her feel comfortable, beautiful and confident. And that when dressing there needs to be a little something left to desire. If you parade the whole package, it can come off that you are "easy" for lack of a better term.I wear bikini's and my wedding dress was sleeveless. But I felt beautiful, I felt happy with my body and my mind. As a woman I have earned my tiger stripes and wear what I love. (and what I love tends to cover where it should cover)

  6. Love this! I have never even owned a bikini! And Dianna is SO right! I've always thought bikinis are so unflattering lol! Found you through the all our days link party! Cute blog!

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