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Tag: think about it

Are your Kids Safe

I was thinking about the news this week. One particular national news I almost decided to share my thoughts on, but to be honest, the emotions I’ve seen around the Internet…I don’t want to go there here.

There have been a couple smaller and local articles that have been pulling at me, though, and making me re-evaluate just how safe and aware I am of my kids.

When leaving with a babysitter, have I effectively communicated all the information needed? Are my children safe at a park alone? Are they even safe in my front yard, or my parents un-fenced backyard?

Think About It!

These 3 questions lay heavily on my mind because they all made the news this last week. The first article was about a baby found alone in a stroller on the sidewalk – but that was blatant poor parenting as the mother had no explanation as to why she left her child. News like this makes me so sad!

Let’s move on, though, shall we? I’m writing under the assumption that most of you are good parents who wouldn’t leave an infant alone, outside at 5:30 am.

Case 1

Earlier this week, another headline hit me of a 2-year-old found wandering around alone. There were no missing child reports and no way to identify the child’s parents. So the news got his picture out looking for anyone to recognize him. Thankfully, his babysitter did!

This was just a sad miscommunication. Mom and son were new to the area, and Mom got up early and left for work – under the assumption that she had asked the family she was living with to watch her son that day. But Mom didn’t tell anyone when she left. Son got up after Mom and went outside as well. When the babysitters awoke and couldn’t find the boy, it was assumed other arrangements had been made.

TIP 1: Always, Always make sure you and your babysitter are on the same page, and never leave the child until the babysitter is aware of where they are. I’m sure this Mom is just so happy her son was found safe!

Also, look into clothing labels. I know there’s products out there that attach to the inside of clothing with a name/address/phone number. You never know when it might be needed.

Case 2

12 and 8-year-old sisters were playing alone at a park, after 7 pm. A man dressed in black with a mask attempts to kidnap the 8-year-old – after the tried running away first. The 12-year-old managed to hit the man in his mouth, at which point he backed off, and the girls made it to a friends house.

Mom taught the girls safety, and what to do in this type of situation.

Tip 2: Teach your children about safety. They are never too young to learn to run from strangers, and fight back if in danger. Have a “safe house” designated around any areas you frequent. A “safe house” would be a friends house, an elderly couple in the area, or an acquaintance you trust. Show your kids the safe house, and remind them they can go to them anytime they feel they are in danger.

Case 3

A man abducts a 5-year-old from her grandmother’s front yard with the promise of ice cream. As a neighborhood search commences, a 15 year old boy and his friends are given the description and begin their own search. When they spot a girl matching the description they begin following the car on their bikes. The abductor stops and lets the girl out before taking off.

Tip 3: Teach your child stranger danger. Never accept candy, gifts, or promises from adults you don’t know, and never get in a stranger’s vehicle. I think this was a happy ending because a search was put under right away. So if your child is outside playing, either be with them or check on them frequently!

Think About It!

Could any of these have ever happened to you? We had an incident just last week that made my heart race. We were getting family pictures taken at a local free garden (Thanksgiving Point). After pictures, we stopped in an ice cream shop for a little treat, and to get out of the rain. Mark had to run across to another shop for an ATM, and I thought he had Princess R with him. When out of the blue a stranger told me my daughter was stuck in the door on the other side of the building….WHAT?! Mark had told Princess R to go back to mommy, he would be right back while I thought he was taking her with him. She ended up following Mark but getting stuck in the heavy doors. It could have ended so much worse. We failed on communication!

With the recent stories, I plan on paying a little more attention to my kids whereabouts, as well as teaching them these same tips I’ve shared here. I know we’ve talked about them before, but it never hurts to repeat it.

July 18, 2013
Why I Won’t Wear a Bikini

Have you seen this video? The Evolution of the Swimsuit by Jessica Rey has had me thinking for a few weeks now since I first saw it. Take a moment to view it if you haven’t yet, and then let’s discuss below.

If you’ve been around Home Maid Simple for awhile, you may recall my post Why I Wear a Dress to Church, and be thinking this is a similar post. Well, you’d be right. It’s very similar because I am going to discuss my clothing choices that tend to be unpopular and old fashioned in the worlds view.
But, I want to hear your opinions, and why you choose to wear what you do. So read through, then leave me a comment. All I ask is you be nice.

Let’s get started here. I’m going to quote Ms Rey here, and delve further into a few key points I felt she made.

“We have certainly come a long way since then. From practically wearing a house 36 square feet to wearing about 36 square inches of fabric”

Indeed we have come a long way. I really don’t know how swimming could have been an enjoyable event when you’re being deposited right into the water, but that’s how the world was then. However, if I had to choose to go swimming wearing a house or a bikini – I would choose a house.

For me personally, I would never be comfortable in a bikini. Is it because I’m self conscious of my body? yes. But it’s also because I know in today’s society, everyone is looking at your body – trying to improve you, tell you where you need some work, and make sure you feel sufficiently horrible about yourself so you’ll buy their products to look beautiful forever.

I don’t need that in my life, so I don’t need to wear something that would attract that exact kind of reaction. Give me the house! Thankfully we have moved past the house swimming, and have more modest options now, so I can go enjoy swimming in comfort.

Jessica quotes Modern Girl Magazine as saying “no girl with tact or decency would ever wear such a thing” in regards to the bikini

What happened? Where did all our tact and decency go? Out the window apparently, because as Ms Rey later says, parents are buying these skimpy clothes for their girls. Little girls would still be dressing modestly if their parents would buy them modest clothing. As parents are we conditioning our children from a young age that they must be beautiful to succeed?

As the mother of 3 little girls I feel it is my responsibility to cultivate self worth in my children. I want them to understand that they can make an impression on people with their confidence and attitude, without having to show some skin. I actually really like how Jenny over at Mommin’ It Up put it in her How Not To Dress Your Daughter post.

You can dress modestly without sacrificing Fashion

You disagree with me? I admit, I am not the most fashionable person on this planet (I’d be rich if I were), but I do have a sense of fashion. I don’t have to be “frumpy” to dress modestly. For example, let’s talk about my wedding, and look at my brides maids dresses. I think you will agree that the alterations we did, in no way took away from the fashion of these dresses, and made them “frumpy”. I had sent my 2 best friends and bridesmaids on a hunt for their dresses with only a color choice in mind. They called me up to tell me they found the perfect dresses, but they were sleeveless. GASP! I know you all did that, sleeveless, really Adelina? But yes, to me and my friends sleeveless dresses were immodest. I made a quick run to the store to check them out, and we found 3 of the dresses. It was perfect. We bought all 3 dresses, and then sent them to my neighbor who was also doing the alterations on my own wedding gown. Tell me now, would you ever have guessed these dresses had been sleeveless?

With a simple alterations, my friends felt beautiful, and modest – I felt comfortable with what they were wearing (and may still be slightly jealous that we didn’t find a fourth for me to keep) – and the guests at my wedding could be comfortable as they were welcomed to our reception by my beautiful and modest friends.

Natural sense of modesty…has been stripped away by today’s culture. We need to bring it back.

I truly feel as women we have been stripped of our natural sense of modesty. As Hollywood, models, actresses, and companies selling beauty products tell us as women to be powerful we must show some skin without turning the eyes of men. I’m really not sure that’s even possible actually. We may be able to pretend that the way we dress doesn’t effect those around us, but it does. I really liked this post Free Advertising for Satan, where the author said, and I quote

“Maybe it’s not entirely the women’s responsibility to keep a man’s mind clean and pure, but if the man is doing everything in his power to do what he can, why can’t we as women help him out, make it a bit easier for him. It’s not wrong for a man to need a little bit of extra help.”

Will you help bring back our natural sense of modesty? Think About It!

Modesty is…about revealing our Dignity

Lets start by defining dignity. According to Wikipedia Dignity has descriptive meaning for one’s human worth. The word derives from Latin via French origins that denote respect.

Are we showing ourselves respect by wearing a bikini? Are we showing respect to our fellow swimmers (be they men or women) by wearing a bikini? Personally I don’t feel we are. If I decided to bare my stomach, and allow my breasts to barely be covered (and in some bikinis that’s stretching it), I would feel I sunk my dignity to have the appraisal of my fellow humans. By covering up my whole torso when I swim, I feel I have given my body the respect it deserves. Not only that, I have given my husband the respect he deserves – because no man needs to see my body the way my husband does. I can not control men’s thoughts, but I can enable them by what I am wearing.

And that my dear readers is why I will continue to pass by the bikinis, and opt for something modest in my swim attire.

How Will You Use Your Beauty

-Jessica Rey

June 27, 2013
Spring Cleaning the Car

I admit it. This is what my van looked like yesterday morning, and for quite some time before that. Disgusting right? I keep asking myself why I didn’t clean this sooner, and then I wonder how in the world we haven’t all been extremely sick. Riding around in a vehicle so extremely dirty, the kids putting toys and drinks in their cup-holders; it actually makes me almost sick thinking about it.

So when Mark needed to take the van to pick up some wood for our bathroom remodel, I made a decision. When he got back, I wouldn’t put the seats back in until I had the car clean. Really clean. It took a few hours, and a lot of 409 and Lysol, but I finished it. When I was done, I told Mark all I want for my birthday is the carpets and seats professionally shampooed. Not your normal birthday wish, but it’s mine.

When was the last time you really deep cleaned your car?

Family trips this summer will be so much nicer if you start with a clean car.

May 30, 2013
A 1 Car Family in a Modern World

Last week Mark sold his truck. With a possible (and 98% likely) move again in our future, and trying to finish our bathroom remodel, I believed Mark decided to sell in order to have just a tad more money to finish things up here.

Communication was not our strong point that weekend, when 20 minutes after he told me he was selling his truck we had a buyer willing to pay our full asking price. Mark’s reason for selling was to purchase a smaller more gas efficient car that could commute him the 2-3 hours north in search of a new job.

So for the moment we hit a crossroads. I was thrilled to be a 1 car family, and Mark kept browsing cars for sale. Although I am perfectly content for the time being owning 1 car, I know in the future it will come in handy to have 2 vehicles in this fast paced world. So I did what I always do at times like this – I thought about it!

Let’s make a pro and con list, shall we? Feel free to leave me some comments with any pros or cons I may not have thought about.

For now, we are sticking with the 1 car. Not because the pros outweigh the cons. Actually, the cons just slightly outweigh the pros for me. I like to know that if there were an emergency I wouldn’t have to wait for someone to pick me up, or rely on a neighbor to get us to a hospital. That right there provides so much peace of mind, that having 2 cars will be worth it.

However, we will be waiting until we know where we’re moving, and Mark has a job before making this purchase. For now, during the summer, 1 car suits us just fine. I have gotten so much exercise in the last 3 days it’s unbelievable! I love how I am feeling, and how much fun I see the kids having on their bikes.

May 23, 2013
Finding Self Worth {Think About It}

Have you ever wondered why you matter? Why should you care about things? Why should anyone care about you? Do you recognize yourself when looking in a mirror?

I believe we all at times ask ourselves these questions. It’s part of our journey to become an individual with likes and dislikes. But most importantly I believe the answers to these questions give us our self worth. They tell us just how much we value ourselves, and in turn how much we will value those around us.

Think About It!

Why do you matter? Because you’re a person. A living breathing person, you absolutely matter. Maybe you’re a mom – you sure matter to your kids, even if they don’t always acknowledge or appreciate it. Perhaps you are a teacher – those kids you teach need you. They’re practically like your very own kids. Father, daughter, nephew, grandparent – someone in this world thinks you matter to them.

From a religious standpoint – you matter to God. You might think no one in this world cares about you, but I know He does. We are all His children, and He cares for each of us individually in the struggles we go through. Just as mothers and fathers on earth, He can’t/won’t fix everything and make it all better, because He wants us to learn. Some lessons are hard to learn, others are easy. But also as parents on earth, He feels our pains and our sorrows our joys and excitements. He cares about you.

Gaining Self Worth

I didn’t use to care. That is, I didn’t use to care about how I looked, what I wore, or what others thought of me. At least that’s the outward show I gave. In truth I cared deeply what others thought, but brushed them off as not worth my time. Looking back, a big problem I had was that I didn’t feel great about me inside, so why should I care about my outward appearance? I was a nice person, that’s all that should have mattered.

It took someone outside my family to show me just how much self worth I had, and help me gain more. Mark was and is my rock in self worth. He truly didn’t care what I looked like on the outside, but looked at my heart instead. He still doesn’t care really – shaved legs or not – but he wants me to care. Do you know why? Because when I started caring, I only became a better person. When I found that looking nice, and feeling good on the inside could change more than just me, I cared. I know Mark will love me through any stage I go through, and that was what stuck. It’s taken some time to grow into this new found self worth, and it’s still growing. What I want most though, is for Mark to have a nice wife, that loves herself enough to take care of herself. Sure he wouldn’t care if I went out in a stained t-shirt, knots in my hair, and hairy legs – but now I do. I do because he cares about me.

Does any of that make sense?

Think About It.

Has someone changed your life, just by simply loving you for you?

I got a shower yesterday morning. I put Princess V in charge of the younger kids, and then allowed my trust in her to over ride any worries that someone was going to get severely hurt while I took care of me. Do you know what happened?

No one got hurt. Everyone was happy, and so was I. I took the time to show myself a little love, and our day went so much better than most. In fact, the day went so well, that even the lack of Internet didn’t get my spirits down. I did some major cleaning in the spare room, got laundry done, fed kids, played with kids, fixed the curtains Mark didn’t like, and kept up with potty training Princess R. All with a smile on my face, a calm voice, and love radiating out from me. All because I loved myself first. The kids spoke kindly to one another, homework and chores were done without complaint, and we all felt the sun shining in our home.

I still may not have a great sense of fashion, and I’ll definitely still wear my worn thin flip flops out in public. But my hair will be combed, and I will care if there are huge stains on my shirt. Because I matter to someone – I matter to me. I have a husband who showed me that, and I am so grateful for his forever love.

May 2, 2013
Practice Makes Perfect {Think About It}

Practice Makes Perfect

I seem to find myself teaching the kids this good bit of advice a lot recently. At this very precious time in their lives, they are learning the value of doing something well, and the hard work it takes to accomplish something well.

I worry actually that if I become too slack, they will be too much like me – everything done will be only partly done, or only satisfactory instead of excellent.

I don’t want that. I want my kids to strive for excellence, and reach it. Because really, is it worth doing something if it’s only so-so? We have this little sign hanging in the kitchen that the previous owners left. It’s a humorous, but also true.

I almost always look busy, or at least feel busy, because I’m doing too much only partway. It’s time to focus and narrow down what I do.

Think About It!

I’m not saying everything has to be perfect all the time…because well that would make everyone go insane! What I am saying is we should pick an area we want to excel in, and then go for it. Don’t settle for less than your best. Keep practicing until you are truly happy with what you’ve accomplished.

Think About It!

Why in the world is this the topic I’m thinking about today? A lot of reasons. It’s the product of my mind going 50 different directions and deciding that everything I was thinking fit under this one idea.

I’m tired of being a Jane of all Trades.

I want to hone my skills so when people ask me what talents I have, I can tell them instead of handing them a long list of things I enjoy doing. We’ve had a couple discussions this year on talents and hobbies and the things we’ve given up as we became mothers. Those were some of the best discussions I’ve had around here, and I want to put them to use. So I’m not going to sit around wishing I was better, but I’m going to start changing; I’m going to be better!

Think About It!

I’m not going to give up anything I like doing, but I am going to have more of a focus. This year, I plan on improving my sewing skills. I’ve got the basic knowledge. I can make things that look nice – if you don’t look too closely.

Why this skill? Well, it seems to come in the most handy, and I know my kids will benefit from it. Actually, my kids are pushing me into it. It’s only April, but I already have 1 request for a Belle costume, 1 for a Tinkerbell, and another that keeps changing but I think is currently either Cinderella or Ariel.

It would be one thing if the Princesses asked me to buy them a costume. It’s a complete different thing when they specifically ask you to make it. My kids believe I can sew these costumes, so I should believe I can too. Kids are pretty amazing don’t you think? They see where we can go and believe in us, even when we aren’t so sure ourselves.

Not to get ahead of myself or anything (though I have a habit of not sitting still), but once I master my sewing skills I plan to return to my artwork. I took some classes in college, and while looking back through my old work I realized I’ve got another little talent – one I completely forgot about!

Will you join me?

Pick an area of your life you’d like to improve. Reach for the stars and believe you can excel in it. Don’t give up, or move on until you have become satisfied with your accomplishments.

How am I going to achieve my goal? First off, I need inspiration. I’ve created a little corner just for me in this house. Something I’ve never done before, and to be honest – I didn’t realize just how much I needed this space.

Next, decorate with things that will inspire you to keep striving towards you goal. For me that’s a wall calendar with different quilt patterns, and my college artwork. For you, it might be some quotes, books, or photos.

Make sure you have the tools to succeed as well. I have a very nice sewing machine Mark bought me a few years back. It hasn’t seen as much work as I would like, but that’s about to change. I am now saving up for a serger, because I know they can take my skills from so-so to amazing! Sometimes all we need is a good teacher. I’ve been browsing the sewing classes at Craftsy, and really think I may take one or two…or all of them. They even have free mini courses if you just need a little help to get started.

Finally – get to work! Try to set aside time every day to practice and work on your goal. If not everyday, at least once a week! If you don’t make the time, it won’t happen.

What are you going to work on? Let’s encourage each other in the comments!

*This post contains affiliate links. All thoughts and opinions are my own. I share because I think these classes are great!

April 25, 2013
Look for the Helpers {Think About It}

I’m sure you have all seen this quote spreading around the Internet this week. I really fell in love with this sage advice. It mostly reminded me of my mother and wisdom she would have imparted to me.

Actually it’s very similar to the one piece of advice I’m always holding on to from my mom

When you’re having a bad day – go serve. Find someone in need or pick a neighbor, and serve them. Take them cookies, give a smile, but lose yourself in serving others.

I would consider my mom to be one of the helpers Mrs. Rogers talks about. She was always helping. Always giving back, and always always teaching us to do the same.

Think About It!

When we are having a bad day, what are we focusing on? Ourselves, right?

So what would be a sure way to get out of that bad day? Focus on someone else.

I think that’s pretty self explanatory right there, on why serving others works.

Think About It!

This week has been an especially bad week for our nation. Beginning with the Boston Bombing Monday, followed by a fire at the JFK library, and then the explosion at the fertilizer plant yesterday. Not much seems to be happy right now. In fact, it’s down right depressing and soul wrenching bad.

This weeks events effected me in a way I’ve never felt quite so deeply about. I was getting easily depressed, but I didn’t have that label for it at first. All I knew was I felt bad. I felt anxious, and I was getting the beginning feelings of nothing matters. Have you ever felt that way?

Before going to bed, Mark had it figured out for me. I had told him I wasn’t feeling good. I even fell asleep in his lap way before we normally go to bed. When he got me up to bed, he said “I think it’s just this week, and all the events. They’ve drained you emotionally” (ok maybe not those exact words, but something similar). He was right. I hadn’t figured it out yet, but he did for me. I was drained emotionally, and when we have no emotions left to feel, it starts draining us physically.

Think About It!

I’m a girl of action. Once I know what’s wrong, I do what I can to fix/change it. Since I had a clear answer of why I was feeling the way I was, it was time to take action. I started with sleep. I got a good nights sleep before doing anything else (this obviously I don’t have much control over, it just worked out in my favor last night!)

Once I was up and going this morning, I made a decision. I was going to look for the helpers, and I was going to be a helper. Besides donating to different funds in Boston (read more about those and get links here), there’s not much I can do to help those effected by this weeks tragedies. There is however, things I can do right here in my own home and community to be a helper.

1 – I can take some treats to a new friend who is feeling overwhelmed.

2 – I can take dinner to my friend who is sick and pregnant.

3 – I can stop yelling at my kids, and try to understand them better

4 – I can turn off electronics and get on the floor, or outside for some quality playtime with my kids

5 – I can support different causes monetarily, or just by word of mouth awareness

6 – I can send a hand written letter to a friend -just because.

Think About It!

I must not be the only one inspired by this quote, because just this morning I saw a few posts looking at the good. The first came in my email from one of my favorite home bloggers – Lisa at Shine Your Light. Her post “Boston You’re My Home” includes links to photos of helpers throughout the Boston Bombing, and other reasons to love Boston.

A friend then posted as her facebook status “Wouldn’t it be nice if the headlines in the newspaper and on the TV featured people doing good things? Show the good first I say!”

That would be nice wouldn’t it? Actually the first I heard about the Waco explosion was from a friend who’s husband was called in as an emergency responder. I didn’t know what happened exactly just that I knew someone was helping with some kind of explosion in Texas.

Will you look for the helpers? Will you be a helper today?

Share your story with us!

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Are you struggling to find Happiness? Come join the community at Happify.com If you leave me a comment with your email I will send you a personal invite (limited to the first 4 requests). Happify is a community based on spreading happiness, and sharing in the joys of each others lives.

April 18, 2013
Simplifying Birthday Parties {Think About It}

My kids are obsessed with birthdays. It’s probably a topic discussed at least once a day in our house. I’m not entirely sure why the fixation on this topic. I would love to say it’s because of how we celebrate. After I posted about my daughters Jake and The Neverland Pirates party, I had a bloggy friend comment that she loved how simple we made birthdays, and didn’t go overboard.

So of course, her comment, doubled with my kids talking daily about who they’re inviting and what the cake should look like for birthdays months in advance, it got me thinking. And you all know how I love to think!

Think About It!

You don’t need to go into debt to celebrate a birthday. You don’t need to have food for an army (unless you invited an army). You don’t even need to pay big bucks for a location. Your kid will have more fun, remember the special day longer, and most importantly feel loved on their special day if you keep it simple.

Money. You really truly do not need to go into debt for your kids birthdays. I will admit here, with our first child’s first birthday, we went WAY overboard. Looking back, I think boy we could have spent our money wiser with her. She won’t remember it at all. As your child gets older, they won’t know how much you spent, unless you make it into a big deal as some sort of manipulation. So save some money. Keep the decorations to a minimum, or home make them. Bake the cake from scratch, or pick up a premade from a bakery.

Think About It!

Unless you’re a terrible cook, a homemade cake is made with love, and can even get the child involved spending time with mom. Take my son’s cake we made this last weekend. It was so simple, and extremely cheap. We spent a couple dollars on one of those new Duncan Hines flavor creations (caramel) because we were in a time crunch and my homemade frosting was an EPIC fail! Another dollar for the Happy Birthday decorations, and voila – simple easy cake! (In case you were wondering the theme it was for our son Lincoln’s first – hence the penny for 1 President Lincoln). We used a salad serving spoon to create the bumpy penny edge. Nothing fancy, tools we already had on hand, and cheap cheap cheap!

Presents. Who has ever bought their child an expensive toy only to have it break a week later, or be forgotten about in place of a cardboard box? I’m not saying give your child a cardboard box (though I know mine would love that!), but really think about the presents worth before shelling out all your money. I also suggest, that if you invite friends and family to the birthday party, you let them know a gift is not expected – just their presence.

Think About It!

I don’t like my friends feeling like we just want a present out of them. All we really want is to spend time making memories while celebrating their life. Presents are fun and nice, and I’m sure the kids really love them, but is it what they remember? There are very very few presents I was given that I still remember. I do remember the memories from the day though. Having my BFF over to play just because it was my birthday. Having all my friends and their mothers over for a mother daughter night because I turned into a young women and was no longer a little girl.

Food. Have you ever had leftovers because you weren’t sure how much dinner your family would eat? Have you ever had leftovers from a party because you made too much salad, bought too many hot dogs, or filled your freezer with ice cream?

Think About It!

Food at a birthday party should be the simplest part. If you plan a party around lunch or dinner, you’ll want to have enough, but don’t go overboard. Finger foods like a veggie/fruit tray and sandwiches are perfect for small children’s birthdays. Just do your friends a favor and find out if there are any allergies. You’d hate to only have PB&J’s for a kid with a peanut allergy. Another of our favorite birthday foods is a $5 pizza from Little Caesers, and a bag of salad.

Games. Make and create your own games! I remember my parents throwing me a Carnival party for my 8th birthday. It was the most friends I had ever had over at one time. My dad painted a bean bag toss on a piece of cardboard. We had a “fishing pond” made from sheets. And then a bucket full of water balloons and squirt guns. Simple, easy and cheap. It was by far the best birthday I ever remember, that probably cost my parents next to nothing to put together.

When we celebrated Princess C’s birthday, Mark put together a treasure hunt. Using a paint program on the computer he mapped out our yard, and placed X’s where all the clues were. We didn’t need a fancy one time expensive Disney themed map, when we could make our own. You don’t either!

Think About It!

Traditions. Finally my favorite way to simplify and truly celebrate our children’s birthdays are by carrying on traditions. Things like singing the Happy Birthday song are fun, and do make it special – but have you ever changed it up some? You know like they do at restaurants? I recall many birthdays laughing as my dad sang us this version

Oh Happy Birthday. Oh Happy Birthday. There is Sadness in the Air, People Dying Everywhere, but Happy Birthday. Oh Happy Birthday.

Albeit maybe a little morbid, and depressing. I don’t currently sing this song to my kids, but I still have fond memories of my dad singing and everyone joining in.

Another family tradition, that I know Mark just loves, and I have carried on to my kids is one where we all get to whack the birthday person on the head after singing this catchy tune

Heavy Heavy Hangover, thy poor head. What I wish for you is a Bump on the head. – Followed with a nice Bump on the head with their present. This is then repeated with each successive present.

Finally, my last and most treasured tradition is our Birthday Dinner. For our birthday, we would get to pick out a restaurant – any restaurant – and go out with just Mom and Dad (no siblings!) for dinner. The quality time spent with my parents was priceless time not often found with 5 siblings. My parents made sure to carve out that time at least once a year for the individual child. I now very much enjoy taking my own kids out one at a time, to focus on them and the things they like. Talking about their life, listening to them tell us whatever is on their mind, and enjoying ourselves. This is a tradition I would encourage all parents to start. Your children will appreciate it the rest of their lives.

What do you do to simplify birthdays?

April 11, 2013
Kids and Doors {Think About It}
I never promised this meme would always be deep thinking.

With that in mind, I give you what was on my mind yesterday.

(pun so not intended)

Kids and doors.

Have you ever noticed how many times a day you ask your child to “Close that Door” or “Leave the Door Open!”

Think About It!

Now that it’s spring, and the weather is perfect – not too cold, not too hot, just perfect – we have found ourselves outside most days. Kids always tend to forget something inside, or leave something out. So they seem constantly running in and out of the house.

There are bugs outside. I don’t want bugs inside. So I find myself often reminding the kids to shut the door behind them. They always seem to forget though. I guess the excitement of playing in sunshine is just too much to remember a door. Or perhaps it’s easier to just leave it open, because they know they’ll be running in and out.

That then leaves me questioning other doors they leave open….like the bathroom.

Think About It!

Do your kids leave the bathroom door open? I admit, we weren’t that great as new parents. Staying home alone with the kids, I would often leave it open, so I could hear them as babies, afraid to leave them alone for longer than 2 seconds. But I’m better now. Why aren’t they? Why in the world do my kids need to go potty with the door wide open?

For that matter, why do they need to make it a group gathering as well? My girls easily fit the stereotype that females go to the bathroom in groups – it’s like they just can’t stand being away from each other for that long. But when not in the bathroom they can’t wait to get away from each other. What is it about the bathroom that brings my kids together? I’ll probably never know. I just wish they would “SHUT THE DOOR!!”

Of course, then there are the doors, and times I want them to LEAVE IT OPEN!

Think About It!

Doesn’t it make you crazy, when the kids are really quiet, and you go searching just to find they’ve hidden behind a closed door with a permanent marker?

Drives me batty! Of course I know why they’ve shut their bedroom door, I just wish they wouldn’t. In fact I tell them often, they can’t shut the bedroom door. I give you 3 reasons why the bedroom door should not be shut
1. The three girls share that room. No one can be kicked out.
2. I need to be able to hear them
3. Someone’s fingers are bound to be slammed in it.
There is only one time they can shut their bedroom door, and that is when they are getting dressed. But of course it’s the one time the door is never shut.

Think About It! Do you battle the doors being opened and closed?

Do you have a solution?
April 4, 2013
Making Time for Yourself {Think About it}

Earlier this week I was so excited to show off the dress I made for my little niece. I haven’t taken the time to sew for a long time, and it was so fun and relaxing to do something I loved again. We had a great discussion on Facebook about hobbies that moms give up when they begin having kids, and how hard it is to get back into them.

Today I want to continue that discussion a bit more in depth. I want to know – before you had kids,

What did you enjoy doing?

What were your hobbies?

How did you relax and de-stress?

Did you stop doing those things when kids came?

Have you picked any back up?

While you are all thinking about the answers to those let’s Think About It!

Why do we have hobbies? A hobby is something we do for enjoyment, not because we have to. Something that if given a little free time, we could be found engaged in our hobby. I personally have many hobbies. The longest standing hobby for me, though, is reading. As a child my mom read me The Little House on The Prairie Series, while my dad read us the Prydain Chronicles. When I began reading chapter books on my own I started with the Chronicles of Narnia. There is only one time I remember not having the time for this hobby – after I had kids.

With our first, I could be found nursing with a book in hand. But as she grew, and I got busy with work, and the becoming pregnant with a 2nd 9months later, I even lost the time to read. It wasn’t until my mother in law bought me the Twilight series (yes I read them and enjoyed them), that I even noticed I hadn’t picked up a book for almost a year and actually finished it.

Where did my time go? Of course most of it went to raising two very small children, and then some went into being wife, followed by all of the duties of a homemaker (cleaning, making meals, budgeting, and staying organized).

It was about this time that Facebook really became popular, and I also joined a site just for moms – Cafemom. I traded most of my hobbies for making connections with real people through the internet.

Think About It!

At the time, this was important to me. I had no job, I didn’t go to school, I was just home 24/7 with 2 babies who couldn’t say much more than momma, dadda, and no. I craved some human interaction. Let’s face it, we all need each other to survive. I personally believe we all need some kind of human contact to stay sane, and not lose our minds. It just makes us happy knowing others know we exist.

It was worth it at the time, but I find I have wasted away many hours now on facebook, not really interacting with others, as I read through meme after meme, funny photo after funny photo. So although I originally traded my hobbies for this human interaction, I do not need it as much anymore. I get out, I have friends, I actually see the people I talk to. It is time to trade the mindless time I spend on the internet for more meaningful time for me – enjoying my hobbies again.

Think About It!

What do you find wasting away your time? Maybe you sleep excessively (although I know no mom who gets too much sleep), or perhaps you spend all your free time watching all those shows you’ve dvr’ed, or perhaps you’re like me and spend too much time “catching up with the internet”.

Take back your time! If you were to cut out 30 minutes a day just for you, how would you choose to spend it? What would it do for your personal self? How would that effect your family? Now what if you can carve out 1-2 hours per week just for you. What would that do?

I know for me – just when I get to take longer then 10 minutes in a shower, with no interruptions, I feel so much better physically, and my happiness level rises. As a mom I don’t get a lot of time to myself, and I allow myself to feel guilty if I take any time. Morning, noon and night, I’m on call to my kids. I love them. I want to be there for them if they need anything. Sometimes the stress of it all makes it so I can adequately, or appropriately respond to their needs.

I need to be emotionally and physically there for my kids. To do that though, I need to care for myself as well. I love Craftsy for this reason too! I started taking a Gardening Class to get me ready to plant my garden – a new hobby for me, that will also benefit my family. Eventually, I want to take some of the other classes they offer as well like –
Clean and Simple Cake Design
Dressmaking Basics
or Hand Quilting

Think About It!

Even my kids understand the need for time to themselves. There are sometimes that we can’t share, because we just need to play by ourselves, without brother taking it away, or sister screaming because she wanted that princess. When they’ve had time to themselves, they almost always play better together.

Won’t this hold true for us as well? If we take care of us, won’t we be a better parent? I hope you notice my use of parent instead of mom this time. I feel it’s important we allow our spouses, the father of our children the time to find their hobbies again as well. Maybe he enjoys a game of golf, or hunting, or jamming out some tunes.

Mark enjoys getting together with other local music teachers to just play music in a non-teaching environment. I love that he does this. I encourage him to do this. Yes, it means one night a week I have to put 4 kids to bed all by myself. It also means that he gets time to relax and throw off the stress from working and providing for his family 24/7.

Think About It!

Your spouse is a person too. I know I’ve mentioned on here the stereotypes of a Stay at Home Mom. We really do quite a bit despite the little appreciation we are often given. But what about working Dads? Do we truly show them the appreciation they deserve?

But Adelina, you say, They get to be out of the house, and in contact with people, and they don’t have to deal with the screaming toddler, hormonal teenager, non-sleeping baby all the time.

You’re absolutely right they don’t. They often have to deal with hormonal teenagers at school, rude customers, a hard boss. Then they come home and they help out with the kids, or make us dinner, and sometimes they even help with the child who won’t sleep. When do they get to be them? Do something just for them? Mark is lucky, and is in a job he truly loves. That doesn’t mean it’s easy though. He still has stress, and has to work hard to make lesson plans, and work with each student to reach their best potential.

So I will continue to encourage him to jam out with his friends once a week. Even if I’m under the weather (which I was this week), I will still allow him to go out and take that time for him (but he didn’t this week, the sweetheart). Why? Because he needs that time to be himself, and do what he loves for him, just as much as I need to make time and do what I love for me. We work better as a parent team, and can show our kids more love and compassion as we take the time for us.

Has this inspired you to start up a hobby again?

I would love to hear what you’re thoughts are.

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March 28, 2013